We've been trying to figure out next year for Chen. Should she take another college course online? She was thinking maybe she has the stamina for two courses next semester.
First she thought of taking Business Math. It's 4 credits and will probably be easier. She wanted to take an easier course because she really wants to take Bio as a prereq for neuroscience, which is what she really wants to take. (Coursera has a neuroscience course that recommends Bio first.)
Then we discovered coding bootcamps, where you learn intensively for 3 months and then get a job. We read up on the pros and cons of a degree in computer science vs bootcamp, and based on it being extremely practical, just a few months, and very little lecture to very high ratio of projects, it seems suited to Chen's nature. In order to apply, they assign you things to learn. So in order to plan to do that, Chen decided against Business Math and to focus on programming. I sent her a bunch of links so it's in her hands.
She has not enjoyed her gemara class as much as I had hoped she would. The girls in the class were not motivated and spoke a lot, and there was not classroom management. So I'm looking into getting her a tutor for next year. She tried to learn with Ari at one point, and tried to attend a class. The class didn't work out because her processing speed and method were not the same pace of the class. Learning with Ari isn't as consistent as getting someone to come in and do it.
I still wish we could learn more together. But I have always wanted to learn more with my children than they want to learn with me. I've had way more success just being available as a resource if they want to ask me questions.
Chen seems to be taking her future extremely seriously. She'll be applying to college next year, but maybe this coding camp is a better option. It will be interesting to see how this plays out.
I feel like at so many stages with my kids, I find myself saying, "It will be interesting to see how this plays out." It's kind of a mindset of being open to however things go and being prepared to adjust to it. It's about not having an agenda and cultivating an enjoyment of the ride of life and parenting and the many wondrous moments along the way.
Showing posts with label high school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label high school. Show all posts
Monday, May 7, 2018
Sunday, March 11, 2018
testing accommodations for homeschooling
I never imagined homeschooling high school would be this way. I thought it would be more hands-on and I'd be more involved. I had no idea how learning would work, how so much time would be spent "cocooning" and being nocturnal, how things would seem to be moving in slow motion and then would suddenly start moving at warp speed, with astounding bursts of intellectual growth and emotional maturity.
Six months ago, Chen wasn't sure she even wanted to go to college or not. I was trying to figure out how much time, money, and energy to devote to getting testing accommodations.
Chen has always had a "processing issue," meaning she reads things 4 times before she understands them. I noticed when she first started reading that she would read, understand some of it, read it again, understand more, read it again, understand more, and read it again. She liked and likes to read the same things over and over. She also has always had some trouble with fine motor things like buttoning, zipping, spreading cream cheese, putting hair into a ponytail, etc. None of these things were a major issue because in homeschool, we could take the time for her to do things at her pace.
When I asked her about college plans last year, thinking about the SAT/ACT, Chen didn't know what she wanted to do. She wasn't enthused about classroom learning, had about a 15-20 minute attention span when we studied Bio, could hardly tolerate lectures. She wasn't sure college was suited to her style of learning and I tended to agree with her. She's always been a kinesthetic learner who likes to choose what to learn, which is why unschooling worked out so well for her. As much as I think college is still the gold standard for getting a job (though not essential), it seemed like there was a good chance she'd be miserable and would not thrive. I talked myself down, telling myself that my goal is for her to be emotionally capable of supporting herself. And if her idea of supporting herself is living in a tiny apartment and making barely enough money so she can travel the world, well, that's a life and it's a rich one.
She has a 504 from taking a couple of classes in the school I work at, where they quickly realized she's unusually slow and gave her extra time to complete her tests. I had her tested by the district, and here's the frustrating part about homeschool and special ed: since she was working on grade level, she didn't qualify for an IEP. But. Since she's homeschooled, I've been giving her the accommodations she needs in order to do grade level work! So we don't have years of documentation that she needs extra time or other accommodations, like typing essays.
So we can do psychoeducational testing. Six months ago, I didn't want to invest in that (it's very pricey) if she might take the SAT/ACT and she might want to go to college and it might or might not be worthwhile. So we didn't.
Fast forward a few months later, and finished with one college course (Russian) and halfway through another (Psych), and it's like she has a fire lit under her. She spends time doing math problems every day. She took out some ACT books from the library. She feels sure she will do very well on the test--if she has the time to actually process the questions so she can understand them. I'm not sure if she can get the extra time she needs for the ACTs. They also have an option to spread the test out over more than one day, and since she does reach saturation with stimulation, that would help a lot, too.
It turns out you can't have testing done less than 6 (4?) months before taking the test. It's March now, and she registered to take it in June. That means the June test won't take into account any recommendations.
So for now we try to see if the 504 is sufficient. But I'm also trying to get her tested. An official diagnosis would give her the accommodations she needs. And if that's the case, then she probably won't take the ACT in June, but later. And that might affect applying to colleges. But in homeschooling we are nothing if not flexible.
Six months ago, Chen wasn't sure she even wanted to go to college or not. I was trying to figure out how much time, money, and energy to devote to getting testing accommodations.
Chen has always had a "processing issue," meaning she reads things 4 times before she understands them. I noticed when she first started reading that she would read, understand some of it, read it again, understand more, read it again, understand more, and read it again. She liked and likes to read the same things over and over. She also has always had some trouble with fine motor things like buttoning, zipping, spreading cream cheese, putting hair into a ponytail, etc. None of these things were a major issue because in homeschool, we could take the time for her to do things at her pace.
When I asked her about college plans last year, thinking about the SAT/ACT, Chen didn't know what she wanted to do. She wasn't enthused about classroom learning, had about a 15-20 minute attention span when we studied Bio, could hardly tolerate lectures. She wasn't sure college was suited to her style of learning and I tended to agree with her. She's always been a kinesthetic learner who likes to choose what to learn, which is why unschooling worked out so well for her. As much as I think college is still the gold standard for getting a job (though not essential), it seemed like there was a good chance she'd be miserable and would not thrive. I talked myself down, telling myself that my goal is for her to be emotionally capable of supporting herself. And if her idea of supporting herself is living in a tiny apartment and making barely enough money so she can travel the world, well, that's a life and it's a rich one.
She has a 504 from taking a couple of classes in the school I work at, where they quickly realized she's unusually slow and gave her extra time to complete her tests. I had her tested by the district, and here's the frustrating part about homeschool and special ed: since she was working on grade level, she didn't qualify for an IEP. But. Since she's homeschooled, I've been giving her the accommodations she needs in order to do grade level work! So we don't have years of documentation that she needs extra time or other accommodations, like typing essays.
So we can do psychoeducational testing. Six months ago, I didn't want to invest in that (it's very pricey) if she might take the SAT/ACT and she might want to go to college and it might or might not be worthwhile. So we didn't.
Fast forward a few months later, and finished with one college course (Russian) and halfway through another (Psych), and it's like she has a fire lit under her. She spends time doing math problems every day. She took out some ACT books from the library. She feels sure she will do very well on the test--if she has the time to actually process the questions so she can understand them. I'm not sure if she can get the extra time she needs for the ACTs. They also have an option to spread the test out over more than one day, and since she does reach saturation with stimulation, that would help a lot, too.
It turns out you can't have testing done less than 6 (4?) months before taking the test. It's March now, and she registered to take it in June. That means the June test won't take into account any recommendations.
So for now we try to see if the 504 is sufficient. But I'm also trying to get her tested. An official diagnosis would give her the accommodations she needs. And if that's the case, then she probably won't take the ACT in June, but later. And that might affect applying to colleges. But in homeschooling we are nothing if not flexible.
Friday, February 2, 2018
Our continuous quest for enjoyable classic literature
I'm bored to tears with Lord of the Flies. K says she likes it, though. (Even though she never asks to read it and it is taking us soooo long. I think when we get to the climax it will be interesting, but it's a lot to get through until then.
I read her the first paragraph of Catcher in the Rye and she was unimpressed. I guess an anti-hero that curses is not a novelty in this generation.
I ordered Pickwick Papers by Dickens. I don't have a lot of hopes for it, but we'll try it. It was free for kindle.
I read her the first paragraph of Catcher in the Rye and she was unimpressed. I guess an anti-hero that curses is not a novelty in this generation.
I ordered Pickwick Papers by Dickens. I don't have a lot of hopes for it, but we'll try it. It was free for kindle.
Tuesday, January 16, 2018
STEM unschooling
K is on a roll. Excited about her Psych course, that she started today. Learning Python (told me she downloaded the software for it onto her computer and is going to work with a friend on it after dinner). Thinking about which Bio course to take and then thinking that she might not have the time to take another hvcc course if she's talking Coursera's neuroscience course. But since she has to finish Bio first (which would probably be in the fall) there is plenty of time to think about it.
Don't forget that all of my attempts at actually teaching her Math and Science in High School have been less than stellar successes. She learns what calls her, and figures out a way that interests her.
I still have to register her for SAT/ACT. Then I'm going to have to put together a transcript.
She asked me to remind her when her Psych course started and asked me to buy the textbook today. At thirteen (and fourteen) (and maybe fifteen) I kind of worried about her academic motivation. Today she's on fire.
Don't forget that all of my attempts at actually teaching her Math and Science in High School have been less than stellar successes. She learns what calls her, and figures out a way that interests her.
I still have to register her for SAT/ACT. Then I'm going to have to put together a transcript.
She asked me to remind her when her Psych course started and asked me to buy the textbook today. At thirteen (and fourteen) (and maybe fifteen) I kind of worried about her academic motivation. Today she's on fire.
Thursday, August 3, 2017
How 11th Grade Unschooler comes to learn Earth Science
It all started with the Office. I looked for a clip of the scene but only found a picture:
Kiisu (going by her Japanese name these days because of her great love of Japan) was enjoying the scene but didn't understand the subtleties of this joke. She decided she wanted to have a better grasp of clouds. She then spent about half an hour researching clouds, how they are formed, what the different clouds mean and what conditions cause them. She then discussed this with people online, telling them about what she learned and answering their questions, which led her to more research.
This is probably more efficient than classroom learning because it's very targeted and she will probably remember it better, since it emerged from her desire to know it.
She said to me, "I know you asked me to jot down when I do things like that, but it's pretty impossible because this happens all the time. I don't even notice when I'm doing it."
That's because for unschoolers, learning and life are not two separate activities. They don't try to avoid learning or have negative associations with learning because they generally don't learn what they don't want to. The only reason I even became aware that Kiisu had studied some Earth Science topics is because we were walking on the beach and it started raining and she began pointing out all of the different types of clouds.
This is probably more efficient than classroom learning because it's very targeted and she will probably remember it better, since it emerged from her desire to know it.
She said to me, "I know you asked me to jot down when I do things like that, but it's pretty impossible because this happens all the time. I don't even notice when I'm doing it."
That's because for unschoolers, learning and life are not two separate activities. They don't try to avoid learning or have negative associations with learning because they generally don't learn what they don't want to. The only reason I even became aware that Kiisu had studied some Earth Science topics is because we were walking on the beach and it started raining and she began pointing out all of the different types of clouds.
Wednesday, July 26, 2017
unschooling summer 2017
It's been a while since I posted. I guess unschooling is doing its deep work. (That's code word for I can't think of anything we've been doing that resembles classic schoolwork.) Chana introduced Elazar (and therefore Jack) to Animal Crossing, which is an amazing game with a small town. You build a house, you make money, you speak to the villagers. Their talk sounds like mumbling and you have to read everything, and you write letters and respond to them, so they are using literacy. I am still asked to help with spelling numerous times a day and Chana asks me lots of history questions and philosophy and literature and vocabulary and science. (Oh, yeah. I'm supposed to look up the causes of and the end of the great depression. I already sent her an article explaining how scientists discovered that electrons behave differently when they are being observed vs. not being observed.)
Aharon (age 6) is in camp and enjoying parsha and davening. He wants me to daven with him, but then I don't do it exactly like he does in camp and he screams. He came home from camp with kriah sheets that are Hebrew letters saying English sentences, which is a cute idea. I'm torn about it. On one hand, it helps the children with reading comprehension and is fun to figure out. On the other hand, I'm a purist and feel like it's better to read Hebrew words in Hebrew and get a sense of the language that way. (I'm such a homeschooler--I have an opinion on the minutiae of education even when I don't even use either of those approaches with my own children.) I put the sheets on the fridge with a magnet in case any of the boys wants to play with them.
Chana and I have made no progress in the expensive chemistry set I bought her. I did go so far as to send her a list of experiments, of which she chose one, and then I read the lab on it. Since we haven't opened the box, I don't know what the items or, what they look like, how to use them, etc. If you know me, you know I hate science experiments and I finally had to embrace that part of my homeschooling personality and admit science experiments are not my bag. And having an expensive chemistry set is like upping my game at admitting I hate doing science experiments.
We are reading Pride & Prejudice together. She reads it out loud to me in a British accent and her Mr. Collins has me convulsing with laughter. It's everything I dreamed about High School Literature: actually reading the book, discussing it as we go: character, plot, themes, turns of phrase, foreshadowing, symbolism. And enjoying the book.
And we take long walks on the beach together. I'm really focusing on not having any agenda for our time together. The teenage years are extraordinarily tricky. I feel like in a lot of ways I spent ages 12-15 putting out fires and worrying excessively about "issues" and wanting her to "understand" things and desperately hoping to impart my wisdom to her. I'm carefully refraining from that now. I just want us to enjoy spending time together. I read Parent/Teen Breakthrough: the Relationship Approach last year and it said that things are really extremely simple: In each interaction, ask myself if my behavior/reaction will improve my relationship with my teenager or deteriorate my relationship with my teenager.
And in all the things I worry about her being able to handle and manage? If it affects me, bring it up (in a way that will not deteriorate our relationship, of course). And if it doesn't affect me, it's none of my business. The entire rest of the book was to explain how to do this, because honestly, some of it sounded like a foreign language to me. Sof kol sof, it is the most useful and wisest book on raising teenagers I've read so far.
I've mostly given up trying to convince Chana to learn Bio with me. It's like every unschooling move I've made over the years. Why do I keep going more and more towards unschooling? Because Chana told me, over and over, in all sorts of different ways, that she doesn't like to learn that way. She told me that she doesn't like to sit down and read from a textbook. She does LOVE when something catches her attention and then she hunts down information about it and videos that show and explain it. And then talking about it and explaining to to people, and then researching their questions and finding answers, and talking to more people about it. That is a dynamic and organic and interactive and social way of learning. And it feels completely different and more exciting and more relevant than learning from a text.
In the same way, she learned to read by wrestling with texts she was interested in reading. Or learned bits of math because they caught her attention (probably her most favorite homeschooling lesson ever was when her father taught her binary one Friday night ad hoc during family snuggle. And one of the oddest math things she ever did was teach herself how to divide polynomials at 3am to help some stranger online with math homework). And how she delves deeply into philosophy and Social Studies because of conversations she has with people. I now have to trust that when different things in Science catch her attention, she will pursue them.
All that was supposed to be a short introduction to what I came here to write today! I got distracted talking about unschooling high school.
Aharon (age 6) is in camp and enjoying parsha and davening. He wants me to daven with him, but then I don't do it exactly like he does in camp and he screams. He came home from camp with kriah sheets that are Hebrew letters saying English sentences, which is a cute idea. I'm torn about it. On one hand, it helps the children with reading comprehension and is fun to figure out. On the other hand, I'm a purist and feel like it's better to read Hebrew words in Hebrew and get a sense of the language that way. (I'm such a homeschooler--I have an opinion on the minutiae of education even when I don't even use either of those approaches with my own children.) I put the sheets on the fridge with a magnet in case any of the boys wants to play with them.
Chana and I have made no progress in the expensive chemistry set I bought her. I did go so far as to send her a list of experiments, of which she chose one, and then I read the lab on it. Since we haven't opened the box, I don't know what the items or, what they look like, how to use them, etc. If you know me, you know I hate science experiments and I finally had to embrace that part of my homeschooling personality and admit science experiments are not my bag. And having an expensive chemistry set is like upping my game at admitting I hate doing science experiments.
We are reading Pride & Prejudice together. She reads it out loud to me in a British accent and her Mr. Collins has me convulsing with laughter. It's everything I dreamed about High School Literature: actually reading the book, discussing it as we go: character, plot, themes, turns of phrase, foreshadowing, symbolism. And enjoying the book.
And we take long walks on the beach together. I'm really focusing on not having any agenda for our time together. The teenage years are extraordinarily tricky. I feel like in a lot of ways I spent ages 12-15 putting out fires and worrying excessively about "issues" and wanting her to "understand" things and desperately hoping to impart my wisdom to her. I'm carefully refraining from that now. I just want us to enjoy spending time together. I read Parent/Teen Breakthrough: the Relationship Approach last year and it said that things are really extremely simple: In each interaction, ask myself if my behavior/reaction will improve my relationship with my teenager or deteriorate my relationship with my teenager.
And in all the things I worry about her being able to handle and manage? If it affects me, bring it up (in a way that will not deteriorate our relationship, of course). And if it doesn't affect me, it's none of my business. The entire rest of the book was to explain how to do this, because honestly, some of it sounded like a foreign language to me. Sof kol sof, it is the most useful and wisest book on raising teenagers I've read so far.
I've mostly given up trying to convince Chana to learn Bio with me. It's like every unschooling move I've made over the years. Why do I keep going more and more towards unschooling? Because Chana told me, over and over, in all sorts of different ways, that she doesn't like to learn that way. She told me that she doesn't like to sit down and read from a textbook. She does LOVE when something catches her attention and then she hunts down information about it and videos that show and explain it. And then talking about it and explaining to to people, and then researching their questions and finding answers, and talking to more people about it. That is a dynamic and organic and interactive and social way of learning. And it feels completely different and more exciting and more relevant than learning from a text.
In the same way, she learned to read by wrestling with texts she was interested in reading. Or learned bits of math because they caught her attention (probably her most favorite homeschooling lesson ever was when her father taught her binary one Friday night ad hoc during family snuggle. And one of the oddest math things she ever did was teach herself how to divide polynomials at 3am to help some stranger online with math homework). And how she delves deeply into philosophy and Social Studies because of conversations she has with people. I now have to trust that when different things in Science catch her attention, she will pursue them.
All that was supposed to be a short introduction to what I came here to write today! I got distracted talking about unschooling high school.
Tuesday, May 2, 2017
Figuring out summer plans
Chana's schedule was a bit much for her this year, and she's looking forward to a quieter summer. We discussed whether or not she would want to spend some more time on her math (studying for ACTs), and if she would focus more on the Bio book that she enjoys but often isn't in the mood to do.
She said she'd really like to focus more heavily on Chemistry. I came across this blog post and requested the All Lab, No Lecture book on Chemistry (perfect for a kinesthetic learner, I hope) and here is the kit that goes along with it, that I haven't purchased. I also requested The Disappearing Spoon from the library.
We'll see if she ends up pursuing this. If she reads the beginning of the lab book and wants the chemistry kit, we'll do that.
She said she'd really like to focus more heavily on Chemistry. I came across this blog post and requested the All Lab, No Lecture book on Chemistry (perfect for a kinesthetic learner, I hope) and here is the kit that goes along with it, that I haven't purchased. I also requested The Disappearing Spoon from the library.
We'll see if she ends up pursuing this. If she reads the beginning of the lab book and wants the chemistry kit, we'll do that.
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
They need to get used to...
Elazar and I are now in a groove where I read him a chapter every night. After me being concerned about TV always being a thing before bed, unschooling won out and he asks for the book. Note to self: relax.
We are reading Danny, Champion of the World (which interestingly, references the BFG). I LOVED it when I was a kid and frankly I'm finding it a bit dull now. Elazar is content enough with it (doesn't love it like Pippi). I think the Great Brain came in to the library so maybe when I pick it up we'll give it a whirl.
Chana is having trouble adjusting to her current schedule. As you know, we haven't gotten back into Bio. I think her schedule is pretty decent: Monday is a chill day (which she needs, after the social Shabbos), then Tues/Wed she has morning class AND my class. Wednesday she chose to have lunch and club at school and the strain is telling on her. Waking up for morning class 2 days in a row and having a day from 9:30-3:00 is pretty excruciating for her. Thursday is half a chill day, since she just has my class and it's pretty late in the day. But most weeks, by Wednesday, she's ready to crack.
I think this happened to her last year, too.
People who send their kids to school are usually horrified at this point that I'm even considering her difficulties. Life is hard, they have to get used to it, most kids (especially in Yeshiva and her age) are out of the house almost 12 hours a day, how is she going to cope with real life, she needs to learn she needs to learn she needs to learn...
I've said numerous times that they don't actually "need to learn" or "get used to" these things. A homeschooler who has emotional maturity is capable of doing what needs to be done. And Chana has shown herself capable of going to class even if she doesn't want to.
The question is, is there a point?
Chana has always been a night owl. In first grade she preferred to do her work after 8pm. Jack, too, at age 2, preferred a 10pm-10am schedule (I'm trying not to future-think, but I am concerned about zman kriyas shema. Though perhaps my worry energy would be better off directed towards trying to raise a child who desires to say shema...).
I have recently read a couple of articles saying that science is seeing how acutely painful it is for night people to be made to function in the morning. I personally am a morning person and my productivity is shot after 8pm most nights. (Just when Chana is getting started...) Is it true that Chana needs to "prepare herself" for a 9-5 job when statistically, unschoolers prefer to live more frugal lives so that they can do more meaningful work suited to their taste that pays less money?
Sometimes I feel like I hear two competing views echoing around me (I know, only two? I'm lucky). One opinion is that teens don't know what's best for them; they are impulsive creatures who make poor decisions, they need structure and they need their parents to firmly put their feet down. Another opinion is that teenagers are mature and wise, they are capable of amazing things, give them their space and their freedom and always keep an open dialogue and listen carefully to their opinions and thoughts.
I've experienced both. I've been completely confused by the paradoxes of teenage-hood. I struggle with my role as mentor and guide to what is basically an adult.
Sometimes it feels like the problem is if I go in the direction of firmness when what is actually needed is bending, I make the problem much, much worse. And the converse is also true: If I go in the direction of bending when what is actually needed is firmness, I also make the problem worse. When I spoke to my Rabbi about it last year, he suggested I "walk the tightrope." Nudge, but don't nag. If I'm being annoying, then drop it. Have frank conversations where I share my views and seek to understand hers.
Anyway, this reminds me of why Chana and I embarked on unschooling in the first place. When her learning is arranged around her emotional and physical nature, Chana is amenable and a pleasure. Our homeschooling has been an utter joy filled with incredible learning. When things are off, though, she becomes grouchy, reluctant, angry, quick to fight authority, and her mind isn't as receptive to knowledge.
We will see how this plays out.
We are reading Danny, Champion of the World (which interestingly, references the BFG). I LOVED it when I was a kid and frankly I'm finding it a bit dull now. Elazar is content enough with it (doesn't love it like Pippi). I think the Great Brain came in to the library so maybe when I pick it up we'll give it a whirl.
Chana is having trouble adjusting to her current schedule. As you know, we haven't gotten back into Bio. I think her schedule is pretty decent: Monday is a chill day (which she needs, after the social Shabbos), then Tues/Wed she has morning class AND my class. Wednesday she chose to have lunch and club at school and the strain is telling on her. Waking up for morning class 2 days in a row and having a day from 9:30-3:00 is pretty excruciating for her. Thursday is half a chill day, since she just has my class and it's pretty late in the day. But most weeks, by Wednesday, she's ready to crack.
I think this happened to her last year, too.
People who send their kids to school are usually horrified at this point that I'm even considering her difficulties. Life is hard, they have to get used to it, most kids (especially in Yeshiva and her age) are out of the house almost 12 hours a day, how is she going to cope with real life, she needs to learn she needs to learn she needs to learn...
I've said numerous times that they don't actually "need to learn" or "get used to" these things. A homeschooler who has emotional maturity is capable of doing what needs to be done. And Chana has shown herself capable of going to class even if she doesn't want to.
The question is, is there a point?
Chana has always been a night owl. In first grade she preferred to do her work after 8pm. Jack, too, at age 2, preferred a 10pm-10am schedule (I'm trying not to future-think, but I am concerned about zman kriyas shema. Though perhaps my worry energy would be better off directed towards trying to raise a child who desires to say shema...).
I have recently read a couple of articles saying that science is seeing how acutely painful it is for night people to be made to function in the morning. I personally am a morning person and my productivity is shot after 8pm most nights. (Just when Chana is getting started...) Is it true that Chana needs to "prepare herself" for a 9-5 job when statistically, unschoolers prefer to live more frugal lives so that they can do more meaningful work suited to their taste that pays less money?
Sometimes I feel like I hear two competing views echoing around me (I know, only two? I'm lucky). One opinion is that teens don't know what's best for them; they are impulsive creatures who make poor decisions, they need structure and they need their parents to firmly put their feet down. Another opinion is that teenagers are mature and wise, they are capable of amazing things, give them their space and their freedom and always keep an open dialogue and listen carefully to their opinions and thoughts.
I've experienced both. I've been completely confused by the paradoxes of teenage-hood. I struggle with my role as mentor and guide to what is basically an adult.
Sometimes it feels like the problem is if I go in the direction of firmness when what is actually needed is bending, I make the problem much, much worse. And the converse is also true: If I go in the direction of bending when what is actually needed is firmness, I also make the problem worse. When I spoke to my Rabbi about it last year, he suggested I "walk the tightrope." Nudge, but don't nag. If I'm being annoying, then drop it. Have frank conversations where I share my views and seek to understand hers.
Anyway, this reminds me of why Chana and I embarked on unschooling in the first place. When her learning is arranged around her emotional and physical nature, Chana is amenable and a pleasure. Our homeschooling has been an utter joy filled with incredible learning. When things are off, though, she becomes grouchy, reluctant, angry, quick to fight authority, and her mind isn't as receptive to knowledge.
We will see how this plays out.
Wednesday, February 17, 2016
high school chumash and other high school subjects
Chana has been expressing discontent with going to school for a while. She doesn't like sitting in class for an hour, she finds a lot of it boring, she doesn't like the kids.
This is not exactly how I've been experiencing it. The girls seem very nice and eager to be friendly to her. When I've helped her study, I've been very happy with the material she has been learning. She has spoken about topics that were discussed in class, and I love that she was thinking more deeply about those issues. There were a lot of things that I don't think we would have done together if we were learning ourselves. And of course there is no "class discussion" when it is just us.
However, she has been complaining about going in every day and saying that she doesn't want to go. This has been a source of tension between us, and a source of great pain to her. It was getting to the point where she was crying when I dropped her off nearly every day.
I was in a lot of conflict. I am in a lot of conflict. I still feel like she needs socialization (ha! The dreaded "s" word! And I'm a homeschooler speaking such!) and that she needs more time to get used to the girls and to hopefully find someone she can become closer with. On the other hand, it certainly occurs that people go through high school without making close friends or really feeling like they belong with those people.
I went to speak to the principal, and as she has been all along, she blew me away with her kindness and flexibility. She offered that Chana can try other classes, can switch around classes, can try classes in other grades if we think that will work.
When I told Chana she can stop going, she was so grateful that she agreed to do all my favorite Rambans with me, since I can't rely on school any more for her skills work. So I have to compile a list of those to go through. I'm beginning to have that giddy feeling of so many possibilities (Abarbanel, Nechama Leibowitz), which I always feel when I embark on a new homeschool adventure. This usually being way out of touch with reality. I remember drawing up a whole schedule for the first year I was doing two grades, 6th and 1st, for Sarah and Chana. Our schedule ended up being nothing like that. I had to drop a lot of things that I wanted to do (most memorably Mishna) and really prioritize.
When I asked Chana if she could pick any class in high school, what would she want, she asked for a math class. She has not been delighted with my math teaching. (Nor was Sarah before her.) Since I really want her to experience Judaic studies in high school, I decided to purchase Teaching Textbooks. Chana originally said that we could finish up geometry and get it for Algebra II. But I am struggling a bit with geometry and this is made for homeschoolers and is specifically designed to talk straight to the student and leave the mom out of it. Sounds perfect (though I do love learning Math with her and sharing my joy in it, I am really not a clear teacher and she's suffering for it). It was pricey at almost $200, but that is a lot cheaper than a tutor and I hope she likes it. I was considering buying a version off ebay for $75, but I wasn't sure if it was the version that grades itself. I consulted with Ari and he voted for the new version.
Chana will have to do it every day and be in charge of herself. I assume if she likes it and it is interesting, she'll do it.
Up until now, Chana was point blank refusing to take any classes in the high school next year. But now that she is dropping one class (she is continuing with Torah she'baal Peh), she is so much more relaxed and cheerful. She will look at the schedule come June and choose a class to go to.
So I'm feeling pretty sad that she dropped Chumash and sorry that she won't be learning all the things she was learning that I thought was good for her. I'm concerned that she won't have the opportunities to make friendships and relationships with the girls in her grade.
On the up side, Chana is hugely more relaxed and happy.
On another note, Chana and my study of Eisav has been going nicely. I'm not doing heavy mefarshim and often we are left with more questions than answers and she doesn't like the answers I give to the questions we ask, but it's fun and that's what is important.
Questions:
Why is Eisav called Edom just because he wanted red soup?
(We talked about how it showed a character trait to trade everything for soup and how he didn't even call it soup, but "that red stuff" but she wasn't convinced.)
What did he mean when he sold it because he is dying?
(We talked about that he took risks and figured he'd die before his father [unconvincing] or that he felt what is the point anyway, since he's dying.)
Why did Rivka's argument "the curse will be on me" if Yaakov got caught convince Yaakov? Yaakov was still responsible because he agreed to it. And if Yaakov gets fired from a job, his mom saying, "It was my idea" isn't going to convince the boss not to fire him.
This is not exactly how I've been experiencing it. The girls seem very nice and eager to be friendly to her. When I've helped her study, I've been very happy with the material she has been learning. She has spoken about topics that were discussed in class, and I love that she was thinking more deeply about those issues. There were a lot of things that I don't think we would have done together if we were learning ourselves. And of course there is no "class discussion" when it is just us.
However, she has been complaining about going in every day and saying that she doesn't want to go. This has been a source of tension between us, and a source of great pain to her. It was getting to the point where she was crying when I dropped her off nearly every day.
I was in a lot of conflict. I am in a lot of conflict. I still feel like she needs socialization (ha! The dreaded "s" word! And I'm a homeschooler speaking such!) and that she needs more time to get used to the girls and to hopefully find someone she can become closer with. On the other hand, it certainly occurs that people go through high school without making close friends or really feeling like they belong with those people.
I went to speak to the principal, and as she has been all along, she blew me away with her kindness and flexibility. She offered that Chana can try other classes, can switch around classes, can try classes in other grades if we think that will work.
When I told Chana she can stop going, she was so grateful that she agreed to do all my favorite Rambans with me, since I can't rely on school any more for her skills work. So I have to compile a list of those to go through. I'm beginning to have that giddy feeling of so many possibilities (Abarbanel, Nechama Leibowitz), which I always feel when I embark on a new homeschool adventure. This usually being way out of touch with reality. I remember drawing up a whole schedule for the first year I was doing two grades, 6th and 1st, for Sarah and Chana. Our schedule ended up being nothing like that. I had to drop a lot of things that I wanted to do (most memorably Mishna) and really prioritize.
When I asked Chana if she could pick any class in high school, what would she want, she asked for a math class. She has not been delighted with my math teaching. (Nor was Sarah before her.) Since I really want her to experience Judaic studies in high school, I decided to purchase Teaching Textbooks. Chana originally said that we could finish up geometry and get it for Algebra II. But I am struggling a bit with geometry and this is made for homeschoolers and is specifically designed to talk straight to the student and leave the mom out of it. Sounds perfect (though I do love learning Math with her and sharing my joy in it, I am really not a clear teacher and she's suffering for it). It was pricey at almost $200, but that is a lot cheaper than a tutor and I hope she likes it. I was considering buying a version off ebay for $75, but I wasn't sure if it was the version that grades itself. I consulted with Ari and he voted for the new version.
Chana will have to do it every day and be in charge of herself. I assume if she likes it and it is interesting, she'll do it.
Up until now, Chana was point blank refusing to take any classes in the high school next year. But now that she is dropping one class (she is continuing with Torah she'baal Peh), she is so much more relaxed and cheerful. She will look at the schedule come June and choose a class to go to.
So I'm feeling pretty sad that she dropped Chumash and sorry that she won't be learning all the things she was learning that I thought was good for her. I'm concerned that she won't have the opportunities to make friendships and relationships with the girls in her grade.
On the up side, Chana is hugely more relaxed and happy.
On another note, Chana and my study of Eisav has been going nicely. I'm not doing heavy mefarshim and often we are left with more questions than answers and she doesn't like the answers I give to the questions we ask, but it's fun and that's what is important.
Questions:
Why is Eisav called Edom just because he wanted red soup?
(We talked about how it showed a character trait to trade everything for soup and how he didn't even call it soup, but "that red stuff" but she wasn't convinced.)
What did he mean when he sold it because he is dying?
(We talked about that he took risks and figured he'd die before his father [unconvincing] or that he felt what is the point anyway, since he's dying.)
Why did Rivka's argument "the curse will be on me" if Yaakov got caught convince Yaakov? Yaakov was still responsible because he agreed to it. And if Yaakov gets fired from a job, his mom saying, "It was my idea" isn't going to convince the boss not to fire him.
Tuesday, November 17, 2015
Chana's first textbook
Chana and I are finally getting into a schedule here. Most days we work for about an hour. We do Chumash, Science, and Literature. Chemistry didn't work out, and we haven't found a book we liked, so we decided to start Biology. I asked my friend what bio textbook they use in SAR where she works, and she told me Campbell Biology. I figured why not get the AP book, since I took it all those years ago. I didn't know if Chana would have the conceptual ability to understand it, but I decided to try it out. The current book is the 10th edition, but since the 9th edition was from 2011 and the current edition was from 2014, I figured we were safe as far as biological knowledge, and it was absurdly a fraction of the cost.
It's going to take us a while to get through, but it's fascinating and we are enjoying it. Chana mentioned again today how much she absolutely loved Chemistry, which is one of the reasons I was so hesitant to push forth when all the books we found were boring us. I'm also excited that she grasps basic chemistry because I think it will give biology a broader perspective.
When we opened up the Bio book, Chana said to me, "Is this my very first textbook?" And I do believe it is. Math was via the internet, and Chemistry was from a couple of books but not a textbook. It was exciting and we took a moment to give it due ceremony.
The Importance of Being Earnest continues to crack us up. High School homeschool learning is as fun and exciting as I always thought it would be.
We are still in the middle of Devarim. Chana is not gaining the skills I would like to see gained in High School. She is reluctant to put the time into studying and I am reluctant to push her. We have stopped all Rashis inside. On the occasions when I think a Rashi is warranted, I read it to her and translate it, and we don't go over it again.
When Devarim is finished, I have ambitions. I have found in my homeschooling career that my ambitions and my children's plans invariably conflict, and that pushing my agendas onto my children leads to unhappiness.
However, I would like to achieve one of the following (I'm an experienced enough homeschooler to know that I cannot have them all):
1) Let Chana choose an area, any area in Tanach, to learn on a deeper level, and really analyze the questions and the overall area.
2) Work on reading and understanding mefarshim deeply. Perhaps Ramban or Abarbanel or Ralbag. Perhaps in the course of analyzing an area of Tanach deeply. Maybe Nechama Leibowitz.
3) Improve skills in a serious way.
In my experience with Chana, working on improving skills in a serious way ends up impeding learning on a deeper level. I know it doesn't have to be that way. But in actuality, what ends up happening is that we have to review it over and over to improve skills, and that is a different activity than conceptually analyzing the material. Perhaps we'll be able to focus on each of these at different times.
I also have grand plans to go through my Torah Sheba'al Peh sourcebooks from high school. Again, to gain skills would mean review, as opposed to gaining the information, which can be gained from just running through the material. I'm hoping to do one sourcebook around March time. We'll see how long that takes and how thoroughly we end up doing it. I also would like to start geometry, but Chana is still mentally worn out from studying for the algebra regents and doesn't want any math right now.
When we opened up the Bio book, Chana said to me, "Is this my very first textbook?" And I do believe it is. Math was via the internet, and Chemistry was from a couple of books but not a textbook. It was exciting and we took a moment to give it due ceremony.
The Importance of Being Earnest continues to crack us up. High School homeschool learning is as fun and exciting as I always thought it would be.
We are still in the middle of Devarim. Chana is not gaining the skills I would like to see gained in High School. She is reluctant to put the time into studying and I am reluctant to push her. We have stopped all Rashis inside. On the occasions when I think a Rashi is warranted, I read it to her and translate it, and we don't go over it again.
When Devarim is finished, I have ambitions. I have found in my homeschooling career that my ambitions and my children's plans invariably conflict, and that pushing my agendas onto my children leads to unhappiness.
However, I would like to achieve one of the following (I'm an experienced enough homeschooler to know that I cannot have them all):
1) Let Chana choose an area, any area in Tanach, to learn on a deeper level, and really analyze the questions and the overall area.
2) Work on reading and understanding mefarshim deeply. Perhaps Ramban or Abarbanel or Ralbag. Perhaps in the course of analyzing an area of Tanach deeply. Maybe Nechama Leibowitz.
3) Improve skills in a serious way.
In my experience with Chana, working on improving skills in a serious way ends up impeding learning on a deeper level. I know it doesn't have to be that way. But in actuality, what ends up happening is that we have to review it over and over to improve skills, and that is a different activity than conceptually analyzing the material. Perhaps we'll be able to focus on each of these at different times.
I also have grand plans to go through my Torah Sheba'al Peh sourcebooks from high school. Again, to gain skills would mean review, as opposed to gaining the information, which can be gained from just running through the material. I'm hoping to do one sourcebook around March time. We'll see how long that takes and how thoroughly we end up doing it. I also would like to start geometry, but Chana is still mentally worn out from studying for the algebra regents and doesn't want any math right now.
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
out of the box for high school
We got Chana's high school acceptance today. I wasn't sure if I wrote up for this blog the parent interview I had with the principal. I was looking for it, but I didn't see it. I was afraid it was too good to be true.
When I sat down with the principal in December, she said that she had so many questions. We talked a bit about Chana and her impressions of her. She said that she just doesn't see that Chana is going to cope academically. And I said I agreed. Had Chana been motivated, I'm sure she'd be able to cope. But I said that Chana had been planning to go to school until she sat in on the classes and realized that she didn't want to sit like that all day. And she doesn't really do things she doesn't want to do. I thought the principal got a pretty good sense of Chana from the interview. She sensed that Chana will be disrespectful if she's annoyed. I agreed with that assessment, and explained that although I work hard to create an environment where we can discuss things respectfully, I'm aware that by nature she doesn't take to authority.
The principal also said her skills were a 5. A 6-8 goes to honors and a 1-4 can't be in honors, and a 5 has a choice. But she thought that while Chana was adjusting to the work load of a 9-5 day, it's better for Chana to cruise rather than be overwhelmed with work. (I personally think Chana's skills are better than 5. But she ought to know since she evaluates 8th grade skills professionally.)
She asked me why I wanted to send Chana, and I said that Chana had expressed a desire for socialization and I want Jewish peers for her and girls struggling with Torah and passionate about Torah and voices other than mine teaching Torah. And that we have Torah in the home but I feel a lot of it is superego and I want her to make it hers. And I just felt that homeschooling isn't sufficient for her Torah growth and for her having a Jewish peer group.
Then the interview took a wild and crazy turn. The principal pulled up the schedule for the current 9th grade, said, "Hmm... when is Chumash and Nach...
Why doesn't Chana just come for Chumash, which is right before lunch, then lunch, then 2x a week after lunch is Nach, and 2x a week after lunch is history and then Nach, so she can have a free period during history. And that's it."
I said, "Really? That sounds amazing."
And she said, "I would really like her to come on the shabbatones and to the special programs."
And I said, "Me, too."
She said that if Chana chooses to go full time, she can skip math (since she's doing algebra now) and she can skip Spanish and they can try to work out an extra free period in her schedule every day, but she really doesn't think that will be enough for Chana.
Bear in mind, I did have a couple of conversations with the principal about this. Two years ago I asked if it would be possible for Chana to come part time. And earlier this year she asked me how that would work, and I said Chana would officially be homeschooled and she'd just take some courses in the high school but the high school wouldn't be responsible for her academic requirements.
I said I would LOVE for that to work, but Chana doesn't want to do that because she thinks it will be hard to integrate socially. The principal said she does not agree. She thinks that Chana will absolutely integrate socially in that situation, based on Chana's personality and the culture of the school.
She has to clear it with the head of school, but if she thinks it's fine then he'll probably agree with her.
I could not believe how open she was to the possibility of Chana coming part time, how she cared about Chana's future spiritual growth as a member of klal yisroel to the point of creating space like that and thinking creatively about what would be best for Chana.
Practically, it's going to mean kind of a ton of me driving back and forth next year. I'm having a lot of thoughts and feelings and worries about how this will play out. But it is an extraordinary offer.
I haven't spoken to the principal about it since, to confirm. I guess when it's time to register Chana we'll have a conversation.
Thursday, December 25, 2014
high school homeschool curriculum
Chana is preparing to take the scholar's exam for the high school she is applying to. I have absolutely no idea what this exam will entail. Chana has almost no experience at all taking tests. I used to test Sarah every year; according to NY state law, students need to be tested every other year beginning 4th grade. Chana tested in 1st grade, 5th grade and in 7th grade.
To prepare, we just went through fractions and decimals. We'll review percents tomorrow. I had been thinking about preparing her to take the Hebrew regents and working on reading Hebrew paragraphs and answering Hebrew multiple choice questions, but we didn't get to that. We didn't get to review Hebrew grammar. Plus, Chana is slow at taking tests. I wonder why we are asking her to sit for the test. I suppose on the off chance that she'll breeze through it and do well on it. It's very possible she won't know a lot of the answers or she will not get to finish it, since our idea of education is vastly different than standard education, and learning how to take tests is not a high priority at this time.
As we were reviewing fractions (it made my heart sing to see how easily Chana zipped through them, remembering how difficult they were for her 4 years ago and how wonderful it was to unschool Math and how smoothly she understands it now and can do it), I started thinking about her curriculum for next year, if she decides to homeschool, and we started writing down a basic plan.
I said that I was thinking that she might want to take a break from math next year (she can always take remedial math in college, and I'm sure it will be very easy for her and she can go further after that if she enjoys it), but she might want to try geometry. She asked what geometry entails, and I described it vaguely, and she said, sure, she'll try that. So we wrote it down.
I asked her if she wanted to study biology or chemistry next year. She asked what they both were. I said biology is the study of the body and the classification of animals. And chemistry is the study of molecules and atoms. She chose chemistry.
I asked her about history, and she said she wasn't very interested in that. But she decided she would study WWI and WWII.
I said for Literature she should read 3 books. She mentioned Hamlet. I said I would get her a reading list to choose the others from. She said that she wanted to read How to Win Friends and Influence People. She asked if that counts. I said okay. She said she'd like to read that now, though, and not wait for next year. (I'd better go see if we have it on a shelf somewhere or if I gave it away.)
I said for writing, she can either hold off a year and we can sign her up for an online writing course next year, or I can do it with her next year. She asked what writing is--is it handwriting? I said no, grammar, structure, essays, papers, etc. She asked how it would work, and I said I would give her assignments, she would do them, and I would correct them. She said she'd like to do that. I asked her how frequently she would like assignments, once a week, once a month, once every 2 weeks.. She chose once every two weeks. She said she'd like to improve her vocabulary. I remembered that Sarah had a box of words from her SAT course so I gave them to her.
For Limudei Kodesh, we said we'd have to talk about it. We'll see what she wants to do once we finish Devarim. I asked her about Nach and she doesn't know much about it. I asked her to choose a month to devote to Torah Sheba'al Peh. I have my sourcebooks from high school and I think we can go through a whole year's worth in a month, since homeschool is efficient like that. She chose March.
I am going to discuss options with the principal of the high school she is applying to and see what they are open to.
If Chana stays home, I still have to figure out 1) how to teach chemistry. 2) how to teach geometry. 3) how to stay on top of writing assignments. and limudei kodesh.
To prepare, we just went through fractions and decimals. We'll review percents tomorrow. I had been thinking about preparing her to take the Hebrew regents and working on reading Hebrew paragraphs and answering Hebrew multiple choice questions, but we didn't get to that. We didn't get to review Hebrew grammar. Plus, Chana is slow at taking tests. I wonder why we are asking her to sit for the test. I suppose on the off chance that she'll breeze through it and do well on it. It's very possible she won't know a lot of the answers or she will not get to finish it, since our idea of education is vastly different than standard education, and learning how to take tests is not a high priority at this time.
As we were reviewing fractions (it made my heart sing to see how easily Chana zipped through them, remembering how difficult they were for her 4 years ago and how wonderful it was to unschool Math and how smoothly she understands it now and can do it), I started thinking about her curriculum for next year, if she decides to homeschool, and we started writing down a basic plan.
I said that I was thinking that she might want to take a break from math next year (she can always take remedial math in college, and I'm sure it will be very easy for her and she can go further after that if she enjoys it), but she might want to try geometry. She asked what geometry entails, and I described it vaguely, and she said, sure, she'll try that. So we wrote it down.
I asked her if she wanted to study biology or chemistry next year. She asked what they both were. I said biology is the study of the body and the classification of animals. And chemistry is the study of molecules and atoms. She chose chemistry.
I asked her about history, and she said she wasn't very interested in that. But she decided she would study WWI and WWII.
I said for Literature she should read 3 books. She mentioned Hamlet. I said I would get her a reading list to choose the others from. She said that she wanted to read How to Win Friends and Influence People. She asked if that counts. I said okay. She said she'd like to read that now, though, and not wait for next year. (I'd better go see if we have it on a shelf somewhere or if I gave it away.)
I said for writing, she can either hold off a year and we can sign her up for an online writing course next year, or I can do it with her next year. She asked what writing is--is it handwriting? I said no, grammar, structure, essays, papers, etc. She asked how it would work, and I said I would give her assignments, she would do them, and I would correct them. She said she'd like to do that. I asked her how frequently she would like assignments, once a week, once a month, once every 2 weeks.. She chose once every two weeks. She said she'd like to improve her vocabulary. I remembered that Sarah had a box of words from her SAT course so I gave them to her.
For Limudei Kodesh, we said we'd have to talk about it. We'll see what she wants to do once we finish Devarim. I asked her about Nach and she doesn't know much about it. I asked her to choose a month to devote to Torah Sheba'al Peh. I have my sourcebooks from high school and I think we can go through a whole year's worth in a month, since homeschool is efficient like that. She chose March.
I am going to discuss options with the principal of the high school she is applying to and see what they are open to.
If Chana stays home, I still have to figure out 1) how to teach chemistry. 2) how to teach geometry. 3) how to stay on top of writing assignments. and limudei kodesh.
home for high school
Chana went for her interview this week. I'm having the parent interview on Monday (they know I'm home with the kids and couldn't come in if Chana wasn't home to babysit, so we scheduled the parent interview for a different day). Chana liked the school, and she came home somewhat in conflict, but still inclined towards homeschooling. She just doesn't think she can tolerate sitting in class all day and thinks it will be incredibly boring. I think until she actually saw what class was like, she had been planning to try school out for a year, and try to make friends. But when she saw what class involves, she balked.
Academically, secular-wise, I think homeschooling is a better choice for her. Although I mentioned in the last post that the thought of high school kind of freaked me out, I remembered what was so exciting and thrilling about it. Mainly that high schoolers are basically adults with fully capable brains and the ability to be in charge of their own educations.
And with the possibility of taking college courses at around 16 (I glanced at both Queens College and Nassau Community College and both have programs for high schoolers) it doesn't really make sense to go to high school.
I do think limudei kodesh would be better in high school. She'd get more bekius, she would learn more detailed halacha, she might gain more skills. But if Chana doesn't want to go, then we'll see what we can do at home. I always did have grand plans for high school, but the reality is I have 3 younger children at home plus I have found that by nature, I tend to be a bit lazy and disinclined to sit and teach for hours, which means I won't be sitting and teaching things, most likely.
And, as I mentioned, I have hesitations about Chana being home socially. Yes, homeschoolers are able to socialize beautifully. Chana's social skills are fine, she is capable of making friends and socializing. But I think she'd have more social options if she goes to school.
At the end of the day, I'm going to discuss it with the school and see what the administration thinks, and Chana is going to choose. If she chooses to stay home, that's not written in stone and I think if she chooses to matriculate in 10th or 11th grade, the school will welcome her. If she chooses to homeschool and then decides closer to the time that she wants to go to school, that's fine. If she chooses to homeschool, then that's fine. If there are things that make her unhappy, we will reevaluate.
I'd like to add that Sarah wanted very much to make a lot of friends, and transitioned to 8am-5:15pm sitting in class with no trouble. Her major complaints were that the learning was inefficient and that they often moved on when she wanted to think more deeply about something. She noted that at least you can daydream during class, which you can't in homeschool, because your mother notices immediately. So although you are in class longer, it doesn't require the same focus as homeschool.
Academically, secular-wise, I think homeschooling is a better choice for her. Although I mentioned in the last post that the thought of high school kind of freaked me out, I remembered what was so exciting and thrilling about it. Mainly that high schoolers are basically adults with fully capable brains and the ability to be in charge of their own educations.
And with the possibility of taking college courses at around 16 (I glanced at both Queens College and Nassau Community College and both have programs for high schoolers) it doesn't really make sense to go to high school.
I do think limudei kodesh would be better in high school. She'd get more bekius, she would learn more detailed halacha, she might gain more skills. But if Chana doesn't want to go, then we'll see what we can do at home. I always did have grand plans for high school, but the reality is I have 3 younger children at home plus I have found that by nature, I tend to be a bit lazy and disinclined to sit and teach for hours, which means I won't be sitting and teaching things, most likely.
And, as I mentioned, I have hesitations about Chana being home socially. Yes, homeschoolers are able to socialize beautifully. Chana's social skills are fine, she is capable of making friends and socializing. But I think she'd have more social options if she goes to school.
At the end of the day, I'm going to discuss it with the school and see what the administration thinks, and Chana is going to choose. If she chooses to stay home, that's not written in stone and I think if she chooses to matriculate in 10th or 11th grade, the school will welcome her. If she chooses to homeschool and then decides closer to the time that she wants to go to school, that's fine. If she chooses to homeschool, then that's fine. If there are things that make her unhappy, we will reevaluate.
I'd like to add that Sarah wanted very much to make a lot of friends, and transitioned to 8am-5:15pm sitting in class with no trouble. Her major complaints were that the learning was inefficient and that they often moved on when she wanted to think more deeply about something. She noted that at least you can daydream during class, which you can't in homeschool, because your mother notices immediately. So although you are in class longer, it doesn't require the same focus as homeschool.
high school homeschooling decisions
I've been agonizing a bit about the high school decision. Chana orginally said she wanted to go to high school. After visiting the open house, she realized that sitting through class is not something she wants to do. She became more inclined to continue homeschooling. I had hesitations about this for two reasons. 1) If she expressed a yearning for socialization, then not having socialization is probably not a good idea. 2) I was looking forward to the variety of exposure she would have to different teachers for limudei kodesh. I am capable of teaching her just about every subject, but I thought it would be nice for her to hear other people's approach to Torah. 3) I thought it would be valuable for Chana to have more Jewish peers and spend time with girls who are both struggling with Torah and girls who are passionate about Torah. (Yeah, that's not two reasons. I thought of a third. What, I should go back and change "two" to "three"?) and 4) Although I had always yearned to homeschool high school, and I was disappointed when Sarah chose to go to high school, I realized that deep down I was looking forward to giving up her education to someone else's responsibility. I realized that I was blithely unschooling for elementary school because I knew that high school would "fill in the gaps." But if I'm homeschooling for high school, then I either have to put my money where my mouth is for unschooling or else I have to step up and teach her math, writing, science, etc.
Although socialization is somewhat of an issue, one thing that changed from 7th grade is that her very good friend who had been homeschooled and then went to high school for 9th grade (last year) came home for 10th grade (this year). So Chana sees her a lot more. It's possible that we'll be able to work out her socialization. However, I think she would make closer and better friends in high school.
I talked to someone who suggested sleepaway camp. Chana did attend sleepaway camp (Camp Dina) going into 7th grade. She enjoyed it immensely but also felt she didn't make permanent friendships, it was very structured, and she didn't have enough time to herself nor enough down time. That doesn't rule out future sleepaway camp, though.
Although socialization is somewhat of an issue, one thing that changed from 7th grade is that her very good friend who had been homeschooled and then went to high school for 9th grade (last year) came home for 10th grade (this year). So Chana sees her a lot more. It's possible that we'll be able to work out her socialization. However, I think she would make closer and better friends in high school.
I talked to someone who suggested sleepaway camp. Chana did attend sleepaway camp (Camp Dina) going into 7th grade. She enjoyed it immensely but also felt she didn't make permanent friendships, it was very structured, and she didn't have enough time to herself nor enough down time. That doesn't rule out future sleepaway camp, though.
high school homeschooling
Chana is in the middle of applying to High School. When she came home from sleepaway camp going into 7th grade, she told me she wanted to go to High School. My older daughter Sarah went to High School (SKA) after never having gone to school at all and after being unschooled for the last few years of elementary school except for Chumash and Math. Chana was completely unschooled until 3rd grade, when we started doing Chumash. I did not unschool Chumash but unschooled everything else, including Math. A lot of math came up naturally until fractions, when we just dropped math completely for about 3 years, except for an occasional lesson when it came up, where I tried to help Chana understand fractions, or the occasional math conversation, which didn't intimidate her or annoy her, and which she enjoyed, because she wasn't generally feeling overwhelmed with math.
When she told me she wanted to go to High School, I said, "Well, you're going to need to do math." It turns out that unschooling math, which was a bit of a terrifying step for me, was an incredible choice.
When she told me she wanted to go to High School, I said, "Well, you're going to need to do math." It turns out that unschooling math, which was a bit of a terrifying step for me, was an incredible choice.
- She easily picked up 3 years of math in 3 months (I heard these kinds of things happened in unschooling and I wouldn't have quite believed it if I didn't see it myself)
- She got to play for 3 years instead of struggling with subjects her brain wasn't ready to handle yet
- She doesn't feel intimidated or stressed by math
- She doesn't feel bad about herself or feel like she is "bad" at math
So she is preparing for the Algebra regents now, so she can enter 9th grade. She filled out her application and she went to the open house.
She sat through the mini lessons. 6 mini lessons, 6 minutes each. About half an hour of lessons. They were very cute, interesting, some of them hands on. (For example, the English mini lesson had us write our own 6 word memoirs.) Chana came out of them a bit shell-shocked. Chana has always been a kinesthetic learner, not as inclined to read or to listen or to see as to touch and do. The idea of sitting from 9am to 5pm and passively have people talking at her was a bit horrifying to her.
She drew up a list of pros and cons of school vs. homeschooling. You can see that something that annoys her about homeschooling is that I drag her to classes for things she doesn't want to sit through. Kal V'chomer for more hours a day. I suggested part time, but she didn't feel that she gains advantages from that.
pros
potential friends
cons
less time for animation
violin difficult
lots of work
bored in class for lots of hours
being with people I don't want to be with
full time homeschool
pros
more time for animation
more time for violin
more time to do stuff I want
freedom of movement
choice of activity
can make fun of teacher
cons
few friends
forced to be dragged to classes I don't want
have to be friendly to other homeschoolers
part time school/homeschool
pros:
pros:
can have a school atmosphere but for less time
cons:
still no time because have work and other stuff
have to do schoolwork
can't make friends part time
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