Thursday, November 30, 2017

an unschooling quote

Parenting a teen in addition to the boys now that they've gotten over the tantrumy, crying, messy, screaming years gives me a hearty appreciation for the quiet peaceful life.  But I just read this quote and it's nice:

Sandra Dodd has a quote “Unschooling should and can be bigger and better than school. If it's smaller and quieter than school, the mom should do more to make life sparkly.” 

Sunday, November 19, 2017

Lazy Sundays and the Baby/Toddler Years

I once spoke about unschooling and said that our every day is like Sunday.  Meaning that relaxed day of the week where you wake up and have no responsibilities and obligations and can relax, take your time, and do whatever you want.

Today IS actually Sunday.  I woke up early and read in bed for an hour.  Aharon (6) is finally sleeping late.  He came in to say good morning and went downstairs, leaving me to lie in bed a little more.  I came downstairs and davened out loud so Aharon could hear me.  It's Rosh Chodesh, so every time I saying "beis Aharon" I paused and pointed to him and he filled in "Aharon" to give him a little thrill that davening has his name.  Just as I finished singing, Elazar came in from a sleepover.  He davened (Ari's been working on him reading the first line of birchas hatorah, baruch she'amar, ashrei, shema, and shemona esrei) and then had breakfast and went to another playdate.  During breakfast he asked me why he has a hard time realizing when he's hungry.

Jack found a k'nex set and is sitting with the neighbors doing it.  Aharon is watching.

I watched a chemistry video song parody and noted which parts K and I have learned together and which parts she doesn't know yet.  I sent it to her to enjoy.  We'll probably go on a long walk later.  Maybe we'll try to time it with sunset.  We finished Pride and Prejudice and watched the BBC miniseries, and we are planning to watch the movie, the 1940s movie, and PPZ (Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, which I hear is surprisingly decent).  We have to pick something new to read.  I have The Most Dangerous Game and Lord of the Flies.  I'm also thinking about Mila 18.  But it would be nice to find something funny.  She wants to reread The Importance of Being Earnest.  I already know that her personality is that she likes to go deeply into things rather than study many things. 

Then I looked up Wales because K and I were looking at the map yesterday and couldn't find where in England it was.

A homeschool friend of mine expressed this week that she is putting her preschooler into preschool and she feels like a failure.  Aside from the fact that I know homeschoolers who davka put their preschoolers in school so that they could teach the older kids.  And aside from the fact that there is nothing wrong with doing things for your sanity or for the benefit of the family as a whole.  And there is nothing wrong with having some kids in school and some kids homeschooled.  (Or putting your kids back in school, if that's what you decide for your family.)  I realized that I never really was in that situation.  I had very large spaces between my two older ones.  So I was usually only teaching one older child when there was a baby/toddler.  And the boys are kind of growing up close together so there are no babies/toddlers now.  I remember when homeschooling was a blur of trying to teach one older child while having a baby and two toddlers.  But one older child doesn't take that much time to teach.

Homeschooling with no babies and toddlers is a really different time of life.  I have a full night's sleep (except when my worry about my teenager gives me insomnia).  My house isn't as messy.  Things are more relaxed.  A friend of mine, a veteran homeschooler with six children, told me that every year a baby is born is a lost year homeschooling.  And I tried to remember that piece of wisdom as I lost years.  I lost months to nausea, months to tiredness, months to doctors and medical situations, and months to being not optimally functional.  And I worried, how will my children learn if I am always too busy or tired or overwhelmed to teach them?  It was a constant, in-the-background kind of worry for those years.  Unschooling did alleviate a lot of that for me because the focus is more about spending time and being mentally present with your children and less about "teaching" them.  I suppose eventually the kids grow up or you have enough older kids to form some sort of rotation of childcare while you teach.  Every family juggles it differently, but there is no question it is a juggle.

Have I mentioned that the kids are really enjoying the multiplication chart on the fridge?